Tag Archives: Comics

Marvel Comics’ Summer of Bull$#!+: My thoughts on the 2015 reveals

Marvel BS 2015

By Nick Saunders
11/1/14

With all of the recent announcements from Marvel relating to their upcoming Summer 2015 events, I figured it was a good time to weigh in on the subject. Speaking of weight, I am pushing a svelte 327 pounds at the moment, and I think a cool 25% of that is the gorgeous cinnamon beard I’ve been cultivating as of late.

For better or worse, I really don’t feel like doing a whole ton of research to back up anything I opine herein. So if any of my three readers want to pepper my comments feed with fact-checking that contradicts me, be my guest.

I feel less like taking a title-by-title crack at these revealed series, and more like stating my intense distaste at what appears to be a double whammy of laziness and fanwanking by the editorial staff at Marvel. By the previews shown, they are planning on events such as Secret Wars, Armor Wars, Civil War, Planet Hulk, House of M, Age of Apocalypse, Old Man Logan, and Infinity Gauntlet just to name a handful. If the list that I just spouted off to you sounds like a verbatim bibliography of some of the biggest Marvel crossover events of the last 30 years, don’t fret because it’s not the mescaline talking. Apparently they are somehow planning to create either continuances or re-imaginations of all these previous crossovers, and publish all of them during the summer of 2015.

It is at this juncture where I almost feel like calling bullsh*t on the whole thing- this must be Marvel dicking around in a sadistic fashion with the perverse desire to see fanboys’ heads explode like a tranny Schwarzenegger in Total Recall. Once they’ve gotten the geek community all hot and frothy with nerd rage, they will come back and and let us know that the whole world just got Punk’d. Hell, they might even get Kristen Bell to stop shaving Dax Shepard’s ass long enough just so he can come break the news to us all.

However, the cynic in me (like the last paragraph wasn’t cynical enough) thinks the people at Marvel have something even more insidious planned. I suspect that they are going to publish all these titles, hoping that nostalgic suckers like myself will buy them to re-live the awesomeness that the regurgitated titles harken back to. I fear that this is a 100% real publishing campaign, and as such is the worst case of fan-baiting shysterism this side of The Death of (insert iconic comic book character set to be resurrected in the very near future here).

You know what they one thing they didn’t take into account is though? That nerds like myself either own, or have a close personal homeboy who owns, the trades of these original titles they are siphoning from. So if I really want to nostalgically relive these epic stories, I will read them as originally published.

So droppeth the FigureBOMB.

(Nick Saunders is not a raging fanboy; he only plays one on T.V. He fully acknowledges that he may be entirely wrong about this, and come next summer will be eating a buttload of crow)

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By Nick Saunders
9/13/13

Greetings all! Whether by hard work, an amazing stroke of luck, or both, this week I was offered a spot as a Contributor at The Comixverse, a fantastic website dedicated to all things geek. While I am transitioning into this new role, I will be temporarily decreasing the frequency of original posts here on figureBOMB. However, I will be posting updates and linking to my work at The Comixverse so you can continue following my spastic musings.

I want to thank everyone who has supported me in pursuing this silly dream of mine from day one, and helped give me the confidence to continue my writing. Especially my amazing wife, who has tolerated all of my late nights spent getting this effort off the ground.

I also want to thank the editors at The Comixverse (Joe, Zedric, Troy, and Jason) for permitting my rantings to be published on their awesome site.

Batman and the Daredevil of Hollywoodland (aka Affleck was the Bomb in Phantoms)

affleck west batman-picsay

By Nick Saunders
8/28/13

I love being a geek. It allows me to hold dearly onto childhood passions under the guise of being idiosyncratic, fun-loving, intellectual, and different. The truth is I just never grew up, and while most men of my age get all hot and bothered about the latest Callaway driver or the rising value of their diversified stock portfolio, I on the other hand get my jollies from the latest Transformer, Action Figure, or Superhero film to be revealed.

Which brings me to today’s topic, the casting of Ben Affleck as the new Batman. Why are all these people foaming from their collective rabid mouths with such embittered nerd rage? The backlash has been so immense from the fan community that there currently is a petition on Change.org with over 85,000 signatures on it to reverse the casting decision. Something tells me that the individuals who founded this website weren’t considering the protest of superhero movie actors to be the kind of sweeping public policy reform they were hoping to invigorate.

But back to the lecture at hand. From this young G’s perspective, before trashing Affleck we should take an objective gander at his career thus far. Yes, during his meteoric rise to fame he made some awful films whilst firmly nuzzled up to J-Lo. The usual suspects come to mind- Phantoms was garbage, Reindeer Games wack, and Gigli is an everlasting example of the pitfalls encountered when a power couple drinks too much of their own Kool-Aid and believes their hubris alone will translate into cinematic gold.

However, Good Will Hunting was a very good film, one for which his contribution tends to be severely overlooked, despite winning an Oscar and a Golden Globe for co-authoring the screenplay. He was compelling in his portrayal as the embattled Superman actor George Reeves in Hollywoodland. He showed he has directorial chops in Gone Baby Gone. The Town was tight. In Argo he acted and directed his way to a Best Picture Oscar. This guy hasn’t had a misstep in over half a decade.

Even Daredevil catches him an inordinate and unjustified amount of flack. I went back and rewatched it recently, and it is not a bad film. When I think of terrible superhero movies, I think of Spawn, Ang Lee’s Hulk, Ghost Rider, and Spiderman 3. Daredevil was better than all these stink nuggets combined, which is an empirical fact because I just published it on the interwebs.

Let’s keep an open mind here people. Michael Keaton, who initially appeared to be horribly miscast in Tim Burton’s Batman films, was a surprisingly good fit for the tights. George Clooney, who I initially thought was a perfect choice for the role, almost killed the franchise by coating it in an impenetrable veneer of fail. I figured Val Kilmer would suck as Batman, and I was right. And Christian Bale, well I didn’t know who the heck he was to even have an advance opinion. But he was pretty dang good.

The moral of the story is that social justice should not be intermingled with fanboyism of any sort, and that history dictates that unconventional casting has worked for Batman films in the past.